The Secret Diary of .....
Any resembelance to persons rich or poor (though mostly rich) is entirely coincidental.
December 31st 2008
It's been an ace month! Lots of the usual not doing anything really and no one really cares. All this and they pay me as well. Just found out that I can go at the end of next month and still get an extra grand a month. Looking forward to the festivities tonight - lots of drink and food - maybe some work on the latest car tomorrow. Brilliant isn't it.
January 1st 2009
Head feels like there's a rock in there somewhere and my tongue looks like the floor of the garage after I've got the rust of a new aquisition. It's nearly tea time now so obviously no work on the car today. Water! Water!
January 2nd
Just wondering what the next month will bring. I obviously can't start anything important so it looks like I'll just be hanging around in meetings and trying not to get involved in anything too heavy - not that I did any way. Ha Ha.
Later:
Just heard that Gordon wants me down in London for a few days to talk to some commitee or other. They want to know what I have to say about all the recent business - you know - the economy stupid. I don't know what they think it has to do with me; I don't think that I have much to do with anything outside the company anyway but they've got it into their collective heads that I'm clever or something. As if! Never mind. I'm sure the lunches will be good. Just keep thinking about the end of the month.
January 4th.
Worked on the car
January 5th.
Worked on the car
January 6th
Personal Email from Gordon. I was tempted not to open it - I was going to say it looked like one of those dodgy ones that the IT boys keep telling us just to delete but I expect Gordon's men have some sort of clever trace on it so they can tell if you read it. Talk about Big Brother - Phew. Anyway - he seems to be quite unhappy about something. I may be getting paranoid but he seems to be blaming me for everything. i thought he said it was the yanks and then the rest of the world. Anyone but him hey? Well I'm not going to take the rap for this. I can fight dirty like him.
Later : Calm down! He's not going to kill you and he can't take away the pension can he. Can he? I don't think I read the small print. My bad! Same happened with that company we bought and look what happened to that. Not that I have to deal with anyone ever again. I may just retire and go into hiding.
January 7th
Back in the office today. Everyone seems a little offhand this morning. Usually I would jump on them for not being as busy as they should be but as I have been saying I don't really want to get involved in anything that might last longer than a few days. Not my problem in a few weeks anyway.
As always happens after Christmas (and the Summer holidays - and the Easter Holidays) I'd forgotten my password. The people on the help-desk asked me to send them an email to prove who I was but I told them I couldn't log in to send them an email. Eventually Sandra came in and after seeing me sitting there trying password after password, she harrumphed and typed it in for me. I'll miss Sandra. I wouldn't be able to work without her. I heard one of the guys on the board describe her as 'leat' but they must have strange tastes. I don't fancy her at all.
Over 200 spam messages. Where do they get the email from. deleted them all but out of the corner of my eye, I saw one from Gordon as I pressed the return key. I wonder what it was about.
Long lunch today. As usual. I was going home afterwards when Sandra came running up with a print out of the email from Gordon which she said she'd found in the wastebasket. I wonder who printed it out and then threw it away? I should have a word with them about security. Nothing important - it was just the menu for the meeting in the smoke. I'm having the liver and onions. ha ha - as if!
January 8th
Two days in a row. A record. I really should have a look at the other directorships. I tried to list them in my head as I drove in but I seem to have forgotten one. I know I'm on seven boards but I could only think of six and then I realised I'd forgotten this one - only the one I drive to two days out of every five and what has got me that huge pension. Doh! Stupid - Stupid - Stupid. Sandra was at my desk when I got in. She looked slightly flustered and claimed she was fixing the computer. I think she might be up to something but I don't want to rock the boat at the moment so I'll keep quiet.
Had to sign lots of stuff today - all that leaving-the-company rubbish. The man from personnel kept asking me questions about options I needed to make but I just told him to check all the boxes that gave me the most money. That's the only way to make decisions these days isn't it. Apparently I have to get it authorised by some minister or other - good luck to him trying to understand it - I certainly can't.
Golf tomorrow ... and some meeting with .... no ... it's gone. Sandra will know.
January 9th.
It bloody rained! No golf! I'm not one of those idiots who puts on bright orange waterproofs and wades across the fairway (fareway???). I'm not stupid. Stayed at home with the paper (I was in it again) until it was time for lunch. Good nosh with the boss of (censored) - can't quite remember what decision we made at the end but I think it was good for the company.
To be continued after a rest.
December 31st 2008
It's been an ace month! Lots of the usual not doing anything really and no one really cares. All this and they pay me as well. Just found out that I can go at the end of next month and still get an extra grand a month. Looking forward to the festivities tonight - lots of drink and food - maybe some work on the latest car tomorrow. Brilliant isn't it.
January 1st 2009
Head feels like there's a rock in there somewhere and my tongue looks like the floor of the garage after I've got the rust of a new aquisition. It's nearly tea time now so obviously no work on the car today. Water! Water!
January 2nd
Just wondering what the next month will bring. I obviously can't start anything important so it looks like I'll just be hanging around in meetings and trying not to get involved in anything too heavy - not that I did any way. Ha Ha.
Later:
Just heard that Gordon wants me down in London for a few days to talk to some commitee or other. They want to know what I have to say about all the recent business - you know - the economy stupid. I don't know what they think it has to do with me; I don't think that I have much to do with anything outside the company anyway but they've got it into their collective heads that I'm clever or something. As if! Never mind. I'm sure the lunches will be good. Just keep thinking about the end of the month.
January 4th.
Worked on the car
January 5th.
Worked on the car
January 6th
Personal Email from Gordon. I was tempted not to open it - I was going to say it looked like one of those dodgy ones that the IT boys keep telling us just to delete but I expect Gordon's men have some sort of clever trace on it so they can tell if you read it. Talk about Big Brother - Phew. Anyway - he seems to be quite unhappy about something. I may be getting paranoid but he seems to be blaming me for everything. i thought he said it was the yanks and then the rest of the world. Anyone but him hey? Well I'm not going to take the rap for this. I can fight dirty like him.
Later : Calm down! He's not going to kill you and he can't take away the pension can he. Can he? I don't think I read the small print. My bad! Same happened with that company we bought and look what happened to that. Not that I have to deal with anyone ever again. I may just retire and go into hiding.
January 7th
Back in the office today. Everyone seems a little offhand this morning. Usually I would jump on them for not being as busy as they should be but as I have been saying I don't really want to get involved in anything that might last longer than a few days. Not my problem in a few weeks anyway.
As always happens after Christmas (and the Summer holidays - and the Easter Holidays) I'd forgotten my password. The people on the help-desk asked me to send them an email to prove who I was but I told them I couldn't log in to send them an email. Eventually Sandra came in and after seeing me sitting there trying password after password, she harrumphed and typed it in for me. I'll miss Sandra. I wouldn't be able to work without her. I heard one of the guys on the board describe her as 'leat' but they must have strange tastes. I don't fancy her at all.
Over 200 spam messages. Where do they get the email from. deleted them all but out of the corner of my eye, I saw one from Gordon as I pressed the return key. I wonder what it was about.
Long lunch today. As usual. I was going home afterwards when Sandra came running up with a print out of the email from Gordon which she said she'd found in the wastebasket. I wonder who printed it out and then threw it away? I should have a word with them about security. Nothing important - it was just the menu for the meeting in the smoke. I'm having the liver and onions. ha ha - as if!
January 8th
Two days in a row. A record. I really should have a look at the other directorships. I tried to list them in my head as I drove in but I seem to have forgotten one. I know I'm on seven boards but I could only think of six and then I realised I'd forgotten this one - only the one I drive to two days out of every five and what has got me that huge pension. Doh! Stupid - Stupid - Stupid. Sandra was at my desk when I got in. She looked slightly flustered and claimed she was fixing the computer. I think she might be up to something but I don't want to rock the boat at the moment so I'll keep quiet.
Had to sign lots of stuff today - all that leaving-the-company rubbish. The man from personnel kept asking me questions about options I needed to make but I just told him to check all the boxes that gave me the most money. That's the only way to make decisions these days isn't it. Apparently I have to get it authorised by some minister or other - good luck to him trying to understand it - I certainly can't.
Golf tomorrow ... and some meeting with .... no ... it's gone. Sandra will know.
January 9th.
It bloody rained! No golf! I'm not one of those idiots who puts on bright orange waterproofs and wades across the fairway (fareway???). I'm not stupid. Stayed at home with the paper (I was in it again) until it was time for lunch. Good nosh with the boss of (censored) - can't quite remember what decision we made at the end but I think it was good for the company.
To be continued after a rest.
.jpg)
Comments